01 September 2010

because time sneaks up on you.

I'm getting it together starting... now! Well, not now because it's 2:30 in the morning and I'm not in bed and that does not classify as "getting it together". But starting in the morning. The real morning. The morning in which Izzy leans over and whispers "Mom, it's time to wake up..." and kisses me on the forehead.

List of things to do that count as getting it together? Sure!:

1.) Start meditating. I did this wayyy back in the day, right before I lit that damn "Changes" candle and it turned my world upside down. And I remember enjoying it. Right before my world turned upside down, that is.

2.) Stay on the healthy eating train. There's no point in spending all this damn money at Whole Foods and then sneaking in chocolate every night. Seriously, every night. I need to save the chocolate for Sundays.

3.) Exercise. For the love of God I need to start doing something. I had that week of pilates before all hell broke loose. I need to get back on it, at least until it cools off enough to run. And then Krav Maga. And then Yoga. Because I've decided I want to be the kind of woman that "does yoga".

Because I am now 26 days away from my 35th birthday and just typing 35 gives me anxiety. How did that happen? Mid-30's. I don't feel mid-30's. Well actually, I do. Which is why I need to start on this list. My body is no longer in line with my mind and that sucks pretty hardcore. Thirty-five. Nope, the anxiety doesn't go away if I spell out the number. Holy shit, how the hell did 35 sneak up on me. I really want to be the cool chick that's like "Yeah, I'm 35 - so what? Look at me. I'm awesome." But I'm not feeling awesome. In fact, I'm feeling 40.

Ugh. Thirty-fricken-five. I'm going to sleep now.